Daughter of A Daughter 

A daughter of a daughter, a child of a child, my mother had me at the tender age of 15 years old. Coincidentally; her mother, my grandmother (the youngest of her siblings) had her first born at the age of 15 years old as well (talk about family history repeating itself). Being that my mother […]

Blended Families

Some families are created in different ways but are still, in every way, a family

A blended family starts with a couple that comes together with children from a previous relationship. Sometimes they may not have children together, but when the family comes together his children become her (the wife) children, and her children become his (the husband) children. The children now have additional siblings and at first, it may be a bit much or the family can all come together perfectly. It just depends on where everybody is, as far as their thought process. It is important to make sure that everyone understands that they are important in this new family role and that they are all loved the same.

Turn Your House Into A Home for Everyone, and Fill It With Love

pexels-photo-259588Everyone is coming from different backgrounds with different teachings and different experiences. It is important to keep in mind that everyone has to adjust to a new situation, there will be a lot of agreements and disagreements, as you figure out this new life. No one is expected to get everything right, with parenting there are a lot of trial and error that occurs. You are still learning each other and trying to find out what everybody likes are, and what their dislikes are. Golden Rule: Never put pressure on a person, give everyone proper time to get used to the family, and the bonding will start to take place.

Life is what YOU make It

At times I know that it does get hard, especially when teenagers are involved because no one likes change. They are used to having their mom, or their dad to themselves, and now having to share them can be devastating to a child. It could make or break the relationship/family, but the key is to stay strong, stick to what you have developed as a family, and everything will fall into place.

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Being that I am from a blended family, and my family is now becoming a blended family I do have a few tips to offer.

  1. Family meetings are very important. It gives a chance for the parents to lay out the ground rules and get a feel of what everyone is feeling. In this meeting establish that the other adult/parent has the same authority as the other, let it be known that respect is expected on all ends.
  2. Family nights bring on a special bond while having fun. This can be from sitting in the house having movie or game night or finding activities outside of the house.
  3. Keep all lines of communication open and clear. It is important for the parents to be on the same page, and also, it is very important to get the children opinions. If someone is having issues adjusting then it must be brought to the table.
  4. Prayer is always essential; remember a family that prays together stays together.
  5. Always make sure that the children are comfortable with this new life. Take some time out just to hear their thoughts and concerns and come up with ways for everyone to adjust.

God Bless,

Taynia A. Coleman

Owner of Destined With A Purpose, Blogger, and Entrepreneur

Website: www.tayniacoleman.com

Email: tayniacoleman@gmail.com

Picture Credits: http://www.unsplash.com

Follow Ms. Taynia on INSTAGRAM

taniya

Relationship Stages: The Good, The Bad, and The Ugly

The Good Times


Good times are always the best part of every relationship. The fun times are the greatest of all time, it’s a time period that you never want to end. Waking up in pure bliss because your heart is growing fonder for this relationship, falling in love over and over, again. Texting and calling throughout the day to make sure he’s not stressing at work, and him checking on you because he misses you. Being excited to make it home from a long day of work to lay up under bae, cuddle, talk, make sweet love. The sex is bomb because the chemistry between you two are like fireworks. What can top this feeling, nothing! There are no words that can describe this happy feeling in the air, nothing but love and happiness. And then…

The Bad Times

The Bad times don’t last long but they do take a lot out of your relationship. You lose focus on what’s important and how to make your relationship grow. The arguing is as consistent as it would be “in the ugly times” but it’s enough to make you go out and ponder what’s going on. This is a phase of ups and downs, one-moment y’all are cool, and the next your bickering for no real major reason. It just seems like you may need a little “me time ” which for some people getting some fresh air, or going for a walk to help clear your mind will get the job done. A lot of the time we bring home the frustrations of the world home and drop them on our partner’s lap without even knowing it. It’s ok to let him know how your day went, but it’s another to be angry and upset with him because of something your boss said to you.

Home is supposed to be your happy place, where there is peace and serenity. If you feel that you don’t have peace at home, or you all are arguing about the most dumbest thing I would advise you two to come together and have a long talk (without fighting) find out what issues are bothering him and vice versa. You can even pray about it and bring peace back into the atmosphere.

Where there is Love, there is also Peace

The Ugly Times

The Ugly times in a relationship will have you questioning your sanity. It’s worse than the bad times, it’s so much miscommunication that it will start to make you feel sick. Most times you can’t fully get your point across because either it comes out wrong, or it gets taken the wrong way. You began to think is this even worth fighting for, what are we doing, what am I doing?Constantly arguing, not being able to hear each other’s concerns, wants, or needs. On top of all of that, there is minimum to no sex, because of the lost of communication, there is no sex drive only frustration.

Not being able to see eye to eye has to be the worse.

It’s like no matter what you just can’t seem to get along. Every word, and every thought, and every feeling becomes a fight. The disrespect, dishonor is at an all-time low at this stage. Your only focus is to hurt each other with your words and actions something has to give!

Now, it is starting to affect your work, your off,  and everything feels like it’s falling apart. There is no win situation because your world is tumbling down. You began to feel as if you can’t breathe because there is no peace within your home. Something has to change but you don’t know what to change or how to change things. It’s a struggle sometimes, but if your relationship is going to work, you both have to reconnect and do the work apart (working on self), and together (working on the relationship as a whole).

Prayer does change things! This is not just a saying, this is real life situations.

Pray together, go to church together, turn your whole focus back to God, learn how to love each other the right way. God will lead you but you have to be willing to follow. Marriage/pre-marital counseling will always help in order to get the relationship heading in the right direction.

God Bless,

Taynia A. Coleman

Owner of Destined With A Purpose, Blogger, and Entrepreneur

Website: www.tayniacoleman.com

Email: tayniacoleman@gmail.com

Picture Credits: http://www.unsplash.com

Follow Ms. Taynia on INSTAGRAM

taniya

Falling In Love; For Real This Time

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Just when I had given up on love, just when I made a commitment to stay focused on me, here comes real love. This love is a love that I have never known, it seems like a fairytale the way my hurt melts looking into his eyes. This love is what I thought I had way back when, but in reality, it doesn’t even compare. No disrespect, but there is a huge difference between someone saying that they love you, and someone actually taking the time out and showing that they love you.

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You see, he will always take the time out, to make sure that you’re safe and secure. You will be able to feel his love miles away because his heart beats that strong for you. It’s an indescribable feeling because it’s something so real.

Once you find real true love you will know because NO-THING can compare

Now I’m not trying to brag, just trying to drop some knowledge to you.

Like Erykah Badu says: Love of my life
You are my friend
Love of my life
A dude I can depend, yeah, yeah Love of my life
Feels like a simple true love, yeah

Real love is out there, you just need to be open to it. You too can find love again. Whatever, you have been through should always be a lesson of what NOT to do, again.

Real Men do still existence we just have to stop going for the first guy that says hello. You’re worth way more than that and you have to know and believe that. Your value is as precious as rubies per Peoverbs 31:10.

Proverbs 31:10

(KJV) 10 Who can find a virtuous woman? for her price is far above rubies.

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God created you to be virtuous and to take charge, but also to be soft, gentle, and to be a helpmate to your husband. You can’t be the help he needs if you’re always in charge. You have to know when to turn it off and when to turn it on. What works out in the field will not fly at home, because God called the man to be the head.

Sometimes we have to step aside and let the man lead and guide us.

He is there to protect you, lead you, and guide you. He is there to love you like no one else ever will. If you are not able to let him lead, then maybe you should say a quick prayer and ask for God to lead and guide you. Ask God to show you how to step back and let your husband lead, and TRUST me…God will show you.

Lastly, Ladies, if he is leading you the Godly way, and properly investing into your relationship, then let him stay focused.

God Bless

Ms. Taynia A. Coleman

Owner of Destined With A Purpose, Blogger, and Entrepreneur
Picture Credits: http://www.pexels.com

Follow Ms. Taynia on INSTAGRAM

taniya

Relationships: I have changed. He has changed. We are changing.

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At the start of a relationship, everything is new and exciting. You take the time to find out what each other likes and dislikes are, you find out who a person really is. After talking for awhile you find out that you guys have more in common than not in common. You began to fall for one another, hard to the point that you guys talk day and night, and night and day.

Thoughts of him before falling asleep and thoughts of him when waking up, and let’s not mention the thoughts all throughout the day.

Some time has passed and you began to wonder if this will be the person who you will spend your forever with. Everything is loving and wonderful, and then you guys start to evolve together. In love in a total bliss until one day you want more out of life. Your thought process change and you no longer desire the simple things, you no longer want to just be ok with life.

You try to talk to your man and tell him things, you try to tell him your new wants, needs, and desires, but he’s not use to this new you. He doesn’t know how to deal with this new situation.

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All the while inside your starting to see that You no longer like what he likes and vice versa. Your conversations are different, he feels as though you have changed and he is right because you are evolving into the real you. You’ve grown, you no longer want or desire what you use to want. You want more out of life but he has grown content, he doesn’t know anything but the old you.

What do you do?!? That’s a good question because a lot of relationships get stuck at this point and pride gets hurt. Women change and Men change all the time, but if you’re going to stand the test of time you will need to grow TOGETHER.

Keep each other updated, talk about the hard stuff. Sit down and explain to him what you are feeling inside and eventually he will start to feel that same way and maybe even want more than you do. He will always want to see you happy and winning. He will be able to stand by your side and hold you down. He should be your confidant unless he just can’t accept or respect your changes, which in most cases, doesn’t really happen. Unless he never really wanted a future with you in the first place. This transition will separate the real from the fake.

No one stays the same, change is inevitable on this life journey.

He should be evolving or wanting to evolve because he sees how much you have grown. There is nothing better than to change with the love of your life, to want more out of life, and to grow together it is #priceless.

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Remember that if he is not happy for the change or even willing to change with you then you may want to do some inventory. You guys should be on the same page, at the end of the day.

God Bless

Ms. Taynia A. Coleman

Owner of Destined With A Purpose, Blogger, and Entrepreneur
Picture Credits: http://www.pexels.com

Follow Ms. Taynia on INSTAGRAM

taniya